Dr. Leaf is a great researcher and neuroscience thought leader. Today she did a podcast on “how to deal with disappointment and failure”. It is a great topic because while we as leaders know it is important to FAIL FORWARD and failure is a gift to learn, it can be challenging to emotionally and mentally deal with failure. The reality is as humans and leaders there are disappointments and failures that happen in our lives and world.
Dr. Leaf gives FIVE steps to process disappointment and failure quickly. When we have these feelings of disappointment and discouragement in our mind, it creates a toxic energy and residual thoughts in our mind. Even though we feel a good leader would not be disappointed or upset, the reality is things affect us. It isn’t that we are supposed to be unhuman and not affected, rather it is Emotional Maturity and Intelligence (EI) in understanding how to work through our feelings about failure and disappointment so we can LEARN from them and LEAD forward. This process is actually really critical to learning from failure and moving forward is a positive state of mind.
#1 – Acknowledge It. (Don’t suppress, rationalize, minimize or dismiss it!)
#2 – Reflect. (Ask “Why” questions to understand “why am I disappointed”, explore what is this about as each answer is followed by the “why” question about the answer – listen to the podcast to hear the example)
#3 – Write down your observations, reflections and insights. (as your write this, solutions appear about what you CAN do)
#4 – Read what you have written and let it go (forgive)
#5 – Turn the disappointment into an opportunity to learn and grow (what is the gift? what do I understand and know better now? what have I gained and learned?)
Listen to her podcast here – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y-xyPK5CJFI
Happy Thinking and Living!